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Twas the month after Christmas and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
Twas the month after Christmas and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.

The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).

I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,

All the snack foods, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."

As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt.

I said to myself, as I only can
"You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!"

So away with the last of the sour cream dip
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip

Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won't have a cookie—not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.

I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life seems a bore,
But isn't that what January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!

Dean Hawk Ministries
All rights reserved.

Author Biography

Dean Hawk
Web site: The Rock Family Church
 
Dean and Kim are the founding pastors of Rock Family Church. They have been married since 1983 and they have five adult children; Alesha and her husband, Aaron, Allyson, and Preston and his wife, Melannie. In addition, they have one grandson, Asher. Since 1981 Dean has served in the full-time ministry. Prior to starting RFC in 2004, he served as a Youth and Associate Pastor in three different churches. You will enjoy Dean's practical and illustrative teaching style as he makes the Bible come alive through both topical and verse-by-verse teachings that you can apply to everyday life. Along with his current pastoral duties, Dean is also an adjunct professor at Charis Bible College in Woodland Park. Kim serves on our Executive Team as CFO, she oversees the Children's Team and the Women's Ministry. Her energetic and contagious attitude, in addition to her love for her church family is evident. Be sure and introduce yourself, they can always be found in the lobby between services. They look forward to meeting you soon!
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