It's also not right for you to be hanging out with a married person of the opposite sex. For one thing, it gives people the wrong impression.

I have seen many marriages destroyed because of this. I noticed one day a girlfriend of mine who was married started hanging around a single guy. It first started out real innocently, because they were working together.

Then they decided to start having lunches together, alone. Pretty soon he was giving her a lot of attention and compliments, although she still loved her husband and children.

At this point as a friend I tried to warn her, and even her husband warned her. But she refused to listen, saying we were all just being paranoid.

I had a real serious talk with her about what was happening and the risk she was running of losing everything she had worked so hard for - her husband, her career, her children, and most importantly her walk with God. Sadly, that's what happened.

It's good to count the cost of falling into sin. I know of a man who was so serious about not falling into sexual sin that he made himself a list of everything it would cost him and the consequences of just a few moments of pleasure.

He listed such things as losing the wife he loved so much and the hurt it would bring to her, not to mention the possibility of contracting a disease such as herpes or AIDS, and then the possibility of passing that on to his wife; losing his children and their respect and honor; his good name and reputation; his integrity; his career and livelihood; the hours and the money he had spent in college and everything he had worked so many years to achieve.

He told himself it wasn't worth the guilt and shame, or the barrier it would bring between him and God. Also, he knew it would disappoint so many people who respected him as a leader in the things of God, and it might cause them to stumble. He did not want to bring any reproach upon the kingdom of God.

Any time this man ever felt tempted, he would immediately get out this list and read it to himself. What a great idea! This man was really committed to integrity.

Most people never even think of the consequences; they just give way to the flesh. It would be a good idea to continually remind yourself of these things so you can keep yourself sharp and strong in the face of temptation.

You Can't Trust Your Flesh
Many times people get in compromising situations, saying, "Oh, I can handle it; I'm strong." Give me a break! Now, in your heart you want to do the right thing. You don't set out to fall into sin. But the real truth is, it's not you that you can't trust; it's your flesh that you can't trust.

How Jesus Overcame Temptation
Even Jesus Himself was faced with temptation. The devil came knocking at His door many times. It would help us to look at this whole passage of Scripture so that we could learn to handle temptation the way He did.

And Jesus being full of the Holy Ghost returned from Jordan, and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness, Being forty days tempted of the devil. And in those days he did eat nothing: and when they were ended, he afterward hungered.

And the devil said to him, If thou be the Son of God, command this stone that it be made bread. And Jesus answered him, saying, It is written, That man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word of God.

And the devil, taking him up into a high mountain, shewed unto him all the kingdoms of the world in a moment of time. And the devil said unto him, All this power will I give thee, and the glory of them: for that is delivered unto me; and to whomsoever I will give it.

If thou therefore wilt worship me, all shall be thine. And Jesus answered and said unto him, Get thee behind me, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve.

And he brought him to Jerusalem, and set him on a pinnacle of the temple, and said unto him, If thou be the Son of God, cast thyself down from hence: For it is written, He shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee:

And in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone. And Jesus answering said unto him, It is said, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.

And when the devil had ended all the temptation, he departed from him for a season.
(Luke 4:1-13)

How did Jesus handle temptation? What did He do about it? He rebuked it by saying, "It is written." So when temptation comes knocking at your door, resist it and rebuke it in the name of Jesus.

Then run as fast as you can away from it! James 4:7 says, "...Resist the devil...and he will flee from you."

Source: Single and Loving It! by Kate McVeigh
Excerpt permission granted by Harrison House Publishers