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Marriage is a divine institution established by God. According to the scriptures, Adam did not complain about the woman God made for him. We have no indication that he was unhappy or dissatisfied with God's creation.

I believe God knows who is best for each person. He knows which qualities are compatible. And when you leave the matter to God, He will bring the right person into your life. The relationship will be blessed and thus produce a happy marriage.

However, I want to address this business of "claiming" a husband or wife. You may have been believing God for a mate for a long time. If you have not received your desire, you may be beginning to wonder why. The Bible gives us a bit of insight into this.
From whence come wars and fightings among you? come they not hence, even of your lusts that war in your members?

Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not.

Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.
(James 4:1-3)
From these scriptures we can see that people ask for things, but with the wrong motive. To claim a husband or wife for the wrong motive will not work. Men who say they are believing God for a wife, but specify that she must have certain physical proportions are not operating in faith but in lust.

What does a woman's physical proportions have to do with happiness in the marriage relationship? Ideas like that are born of lust. Women are just as guilty. They state the exact physical proportions they expect their husbands to have.

I have been married for over 33 years, and I can say with a certain degree of authority that a husband's and wife's physical proportions do not determine the happiness of a marriage. The marriage relationship, to be successful, must be based on more than sex. In fact, our society has made sex to seem much more important than is actually is. We mistakenly think it is a determining factor in marriage, but it is not.

If a woman thinks she is going to be happy just because of a man's physical proportions; or a man, because of a woman's proportions, both are grossly in error. That sort of attitude is lust, not faith, and it will not yield the fruit of righteousness.

And if these physical proportions are really important to a person, I would seriously question their motive for a mate. It seems they really want a physical play toy. A marriage based on such foolishness is doomed to destruction because the motive is not holy from the outset.

Furthermore, what guarantee is there that the other person will stay the same size after marriage? I know a woman who was slim and trim when we were in high school together. She is still beautiful to me, but over the years she has gained a considerable amount of weight.

The same thing happens to some men. Over the years they let themselves go and develop pot bellies, or are noticeably overweight.

Ladies, just because a man is a certain size when you meet is no guarantee that he will stay that way after years of marriage. Men, just because a woman is trim does not mean that she will stay that size. After a few babies, her shape may change.

I Can't Believe He's Saying That!
This subject may be offensive to some people, but if somebody had talked these things over with many couples having trouble today before they married, maybe they would not be facing the problems they are.

This is life. It is reality, and we need to deal with it head on.

Happiness is not guaranteed because of what a person looks like physically. To think that way is foolishness, not faith.

Trusting God requires that we get our mind off the physical. The Bible tells us where our focus should be.

But seek ye first the kingdom of god, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you (Matt. 6:33).

Remember: You are a result of a certain set of circumstances. You have your own peculiar psychological make-up. You are the product of a particular environment, history, tradition, and family relationship. You may think that you want a certain person, but in reality that individual may not be compatible with you.

In addition, he or she has something to say about whether you two should be together. Maybe you are not his version of a queen if you are a woman, or her version of a king if you are a man.

So many times the people "claiming" spouses think only about what they want. What about the other person? Maybe the people "claiming spouses" do not measure up to the other person's standards.

This could be another reason why some people have not received a mate, even though they have asked God for one and have been standing in faith since praying. Their prayer may have been a foolish one.

God's Love Will See You Through
I once had a foolish attitude about marriage. Before I knew anything about faith and claiming a spouse, I did have a few remote thoughts about marriage and the kind of woman I wanted. At the time, I was in my late teens, and marriage was the farthest thing from my mind. I was dating several girls and my attitude was: why marry when I can play? I was footloose and fancy-free.

Still, in the back of my mind, I did have certain criteria for a mate. She would have a certain skin color and hair texture. In retrospect that even sounds dumb. Skin color and hair texture do not make a person happy.

And I certainly would not trade my wife, Betty, for anything. The Lord worked it out for us to be together, and I would not change the situation for a million dollars! Betty is beautiful! She is understanding and patient with me and, besides that, she can cook!

But, more importantly, we are compatible. We have four beautiful children and have shared over 33 years of happiness. Sure, we have had our challenges, but we love one another. That love has seen us through everything.

God's love conquers all.

Source: How To Believe God For A Mate by Dr. Frederick K.C. Price
Excerpt permission granted by Harrison House Publishers

Author Biography

Frederick K.C. Price
Web site: Ever Increasing Faith Ministries
Dr. Frederick K. C. Price received an honorary diploma from the Rhema Bible Training Center in 1976 and an honorary Doctorate of Divinity Degree from Oral Roberts University in 1982; both institutions are based in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

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