The Holy Spirit is a perfect gentleman. He will not force you to do anything. So whether or not you follow peace - whether or not you follow His leading - is up to you. Colossians 3:15 says that you're to let the peace of God rule in your heart.
And let the peace (soul harmony which comes) from Christ rule (act as umpire continually) in your hearts [deciding and settling with finality all questions that arise in your minds, in that peaceful state] to which as [members of Christ's] one body you were also called [to live]. And be thankful (appreciative), [giving praise to God always].
(Col. 3:15 AMP)
Do you see that? Let peace rule. Let it act as an umpire. Let it settle all questions that arise. This is talking about the leading of the Holy Spirit.

Now when you're dating someone, it is vitally important that you stay tuned in to the Spirit of God and that you let that peace rule. This is why sin is so dangerous, especially in a dating relationship, because if you're in sin, it will be hard for you to pick up the Holy Spirit's signal. It will be a lot harder to tell whether or not something is of God or just of your flesh and emotions.

For example, if you turned on your TV, and for some reason the screen was full of static, you would immediately think something was wrong with the TV. You wouldn't think something was wrong with the broadcast signal coming from the satellite. You would assume that there was something wrong with the reception of that signal.

Well, that TV is like a lot of Christians. Sin or other things have interfered with their ability to receive the signal, which is God's leading and direction. Yet, instead of recognizing that the problem is with their reception, they're looking at God and wondering what's wrong with Him.

There's nothing wrong with Him. His signal is still transmitting, clear and strong. So we know that He is always trying to lead and guide you. But if you foul up the signal on your end by living in sin, then you're sure to miss it when He says to stop or go.

This is why the Bible talks about staying full of the Holy Spirit and praying every day in tongues and in your native tongue, such as English. When you pray daily, you are more aware of the Spirit's Presence inside of you. So it's a lot easier to hear Him when He speaks. It's a lot easier to sense the direction in which He is leading you.

You see, in leading you, the Holy Spirit is going to give you one of two things: a check in your spirit (when you know something is wrong and you need to put on the brakes) or a "go" in your spirit (that velvety feeling of peace that lets you know you're on the right track). That's why you want to stay as sensitive as you can to Him.

A lot of people ask, "How do I know that this is God speaking to me?" Well, the more you pray, the less you'll have to ask that question. If my father were standing outside of my room talking, I would know his voice even if there were a lot of people talking at the same time.

Why? Because I've spent so much time with him that I can distinguish his voice from all the others. And the more time you spend with God the more you will know His voice.

So stay "prayed up" when you're in the dating process. The more you pray, the more you'll be able to sense that velvety feeling in your spirit. That's His peace. That's God saying, "Go!" You'll also recognize when you get that big, fat check in your spirit. That's His warning. That's God saying, "Stop!"
But I say, walk and live [habitually] in the [Holy] Spirit [responsive to and controlled and guided by the Spirit]; then you will certainly not gratify the cravings and desires of the flesh (of human nature without God).
(Gal. 5:16 AMP)
We're supposed to live lives that are continually controlled, responsive to, and guided by the Spirit of God. Before we do anything, we should check on the inside for His peace. It should become a habit.

If you'll live like that, you'll avoid sin and the critical mistake of being with someone you're not supposed to be with.

Copyright © God's Plan for the Single Saint by Keith Butler, II
All rights reserved. Used by permission.