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When dating, you can't get crazy with your "physical" expectations of the ideal mate. For example, sometimes men will get caught up with looking for a saved and sanctified version of Halle Berry or Cindy Crawford. Or the women may be looking for a male movie-star look-alike.

They're deciding that they want to marry someone who looks like a movie star. But let me tell you something. What you see on television or in the movies is that person plus five pounds of makeup and special film!

Don't fall so in love with the fantasy that you forget about real people. Yes, there are beautiful people in the world, and you should expect to marry someone to whom you're attracted. But good looks aren't everything.

So don't fall in love with people's houses (it might have termites!).

Do you know what I mean by "people's houses?" Don't fall in love with their appearance - with what's on the outside. That's not the real them anyway - it's only the house of their spirit. Many people have married because of someone's "house," and they're sorry they ever did.

Another thing is not to get caught up in saying things like, "He's not as tall as I want him to be," or "Her hair isn't long enough," or "That person isn't built the way I like." Nit-picking like that will leave you single forever!

You need to make a decision that you're not going to limit yourself to one particular "type" of person physically. God's choice should be your type. He knows what's best for you. Do you know how many hairs are on your head? No, you don't - but God does. And He knows exactly the type of person you need and who needs you. Just make a decision that you're going to trust Him. And let me tell you, He will always show up and show out!

Those external things are not what is important about a person. You need to fall in love with the person, not the person's appearance. Have you ever met someone you thought was so fine that you could barely handle it? And then you had the opportunity to date that person?

Let me tell you what usually happens. At first, every time that person comes by, chills run up and down your spine. However, five weeks later, after you've really gotten to know the person, you can't stand him or her, and you can't even remember why you were ever so excited in the first place.

Most of us have been there. But imagine if you were foolish enough to marry that person! (That's not a pretty thought, is it?) Don't get me wrong. God wants you to marry someone to whom you're attracted, but the person's physical appearance should just be the icing on the cake.

First, you have to have a good cake, and then comes the icing!

Source: God's Plan for the Single Saint by Keith Butler, II.
Excerpt permission granted by Word of Faith Publishing

Author Biography

Andre Butler
Web site: Word of Faith International Christian Center
Pastor André Butler is the executive pastor of Word of Faith International Christian Center, founded by Bishop Keith A. Butler, in Southfield, Michigan and the former pastor of Faith Christian Center in Smyrna, Georgia. His mission in life is to equip others to experience the future that God has for them. His ministry emphasizes God's desire to prosper His people in every arena of life and God's command for His people to do their part in winning the world to Jesus.

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