Let's take a look at the acronym for angel. It's pretty obvious why we would want to be an angel to our spouse. We want to see our spouses have God's highest and best for their lives. We want to see everything they put their hands to prosper. We want to see them full of joy and full of peace as a result of making decisions that honor God.

Additionally, our destiny—and our children's—is intrinsically wrapped up in our spouse's destiny. To a degree, we all succeed together, or we all fail. The decisions we make affect each other in huge ways. Of course we all want the best for our spouses, but it is also in our best interest to help them follow God's will for their lives. "He who tends a fig tree will eat its fruit, and he who looks after his master will be honored" (Prov. 27:18).

Amplify The Truth
Every time we make a moral decision, there may not be a little angel or devil sitting on our shoulders, but there really are two voices speaking to us, each urging us to do the opposite of what the other is saying. Who are these voices? The Holy Spirit and the devil, himself. Both are fighting to make themselves heard.

As an "angel," our job is to team up with the Holy Spirit by helping to make His voice the louder one. We want to "amplify" His words to our spouse—helping him or her to hear the right voice—the voice of truth.

Nudge Each Other
By partnering up with the Holy Spirit, you can help to nudge your spouse in the right direction. By gently nudging your spouse, I mean let him or her know where you stand on the issue, but let them make the decision. God can't reward them for a decision well-made, when they were forced to make it by you.

Notice I used the word nudge—not "order" your spouse. It is your job to help (not be) the Holy Spirit. Usually, your spouse knows what would be the right decision to make. By nagging, you'll irritate him or her, and you'll appear self-righteous and snotty.

Gauge The Situation
By this, I mean give your spouse an added perspective on the issue.

For example, a few years ago, my husband Daniel was offered what he considered to be "a dream job." However, after praying about it, I felt a warning in my spirit and shared this with him.

Daniel appreciated a different perspective, and together we gauged the situation. He then told me that he also felt a check in his spirit, and ultimately, he decided to decline the job offer. As we look back, that was one of the best and biggest decisions we've ever made.

Echo The Word
Without a basis in the Word, all your advice is your own opinion. When your spouse is making a critical decision, just your opinion simply won't do.

Bring the Word into the situation. Is it a decision about food or exercise? What does the Bible say about our bodies being the temple of the Holy Spirit? Is it a financial decision? What does the Bible say about how we should manage the resources He entrusts us with?

No matter how tough or how simple the question, we can always find direction in his Word.

Love Unconditionally
In the end, your spouse will make a decision. Maybe she will throw back the covers and say, "You're right. Let's go to church. Thanks for keeping me in check." But then again, maybe he'll order that piece of pie—a la mode—and then wolf down a candy bar when you get home.

Sometimes you'll be thrilled at the decisions your spouse makes, and sometimes you'll watch in frustration as they do the exact opposite of what you've encouraged them to do. But as tempted as you may be to say "I told you so" when you see them reap the consequences, don't do it.

"L" stands for unconditional love, because we have to love our spouses no matter how unwise their decisions sometimes may be. We can't just love them when they do what we think is right—we still have to love them through their mistakes. After all, that's exactly what God does for us.

Hebrews 10:24 says, "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds." I want to encourage you to be your spouse's angel, to look for ways you can spur him or her on toward love and good deeds - or toward making good decisions.

So, the next time you hear, "Honey, what do you think?" picture yourself with either a halo or a pitchfork, either sitting on their right shoulder or their left. Which voice do you want to be?

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