Do you think you ever give out fake love? What to I mean by fake love? Inside you may be feeling many things toward someone but love is not one of them. But, since you are supposed to love that person, even though you aren't feeling it, you give out your fake love, roll your eyes as you walk away, and talk behind their back later. That is what I mean by fake love.

Romans 12:9 says these words: “Let love be without dissimulation.”  The word dissimulation in the Greek means let your love be without hypocrisy – don’t let it be fake. Don’t put on a smile and pretend to love someone and then as you walk away roll your eyes and later say something mean or cruel to someone else about that person. That is dissimulation. This is something that is done every day. Fake love which is not love at all – is given out every day. Other translations of Romans 12:9 say, “Let love be sincere.”

In my early years as a Christian, I thought this was just a normal part of life. I couldn't just say everything I was really thinking and dump on someone could I? Even those closest to you make you mad. If I would have let my mouth and feelings cut loose and always said what I was thinking, I would have constantly been in trouble. So my fix was, put on my fake smile, say the right things, and roll my eyes as I walked away. That is until the Lord began to deal with me a about this.

One day I was reading in the book of Romans when I read Romans 12:9. “Let love be without dissimulation.”  Suddenly the Lord chastised me. He reminded me of a conversation with someone I had been upset with the day before. The Lord said, You put on a nice show but you aren't being sincere in your love toward him. You walked away affirming things were great but you were rolling your eyes thinking anything but that.  There was no argument from me. I knew I was guilty. I asked the Lord to help me be sincere in my love toward this person and with others. He really taught me how simple it is. He said, “Tim, when you love people with your love, it is often measured by their behavior or getting want you want." He continued, My love is pure. It is honest. It is FULL of mercy. It is forgiving. It is patient. It isn't there one second and gone the next. It isn't looking for perfection of performance. IT COMES AS A GIFT! I don't love you based on your performance. I love you period! If you love people through my eyes and with my heart, you’ll find it much easier.

It was amazing how those words and that revelation transformed my life.  As I moved forward, the Lord would constantly remind me: Be sincere. No fake love. My love is greater than the moment. It's the relationship, not the temporary problem. I began to see my love run deep and the circumstance or problem just something to work through.

Because people could literally see and feel the sincerity of my love, it changed even difficult situations. It increased my favor with them. They could sense that I cared more about them than the problem. People were so much more yielding in working through issues. I was finally getting God's kind of love across – a sincere love instead of my fake love in difficult moments. The kind of love He shows me daily!

Over the years, I have learned how important it is to let sincere love lead the way. Love does preceed performance and expectation. It it didn't, you could literally lose your love for everyone because everyone lets you down at some point. I only succeed when my heart comes to every circumstance filled with mercy over expectation. Of course you want people to perform and act appropriately. And so should you and I. But we all blow it more than we'll ever admit to and especially with God.

If you understand the depth of His love and mercy toward you, then you'll run back to Him over and over again. If you don't, you pull back from Him thinking He is mad at you. If people detect your sincerity of love and mercy, they stay close to you. If they think your are disappointed and mad at them, they pull back from you. Sincerely loving, being full of mercy and having a willingness to quickly forgive, and having the humility to acknowledge your own failures in the very thing you could be upset at others over, helps you love sincerely day in and day out. Acknowledging the love and forgiveness of the Lord is what helps mercy to abound and precious and valuable relationships to be saved. Proverbs 17:9 says, “He who covers over an offense seeks out and works toward the promotion of love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.”

All relationships are valuable. Relationships are the primary way God reaches people. Relationships are the primary way God brings blessing into our lives. So, let your love be sincere. Let it rise up out of the same love God in His mercy and grace has extended to you. His love is unlimited and our love can be expanded!

 ... I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.
(Eph. 3:17-18 NIV)