Resolving Insecurities

Success in life is all about wholesome, positive relationships. But here are some eye-opening facts:

87% of our success is directly related to our ability to get along with others
90-95% of all the people we come in contact with are moderately to severely insecure
We are included in that 90-95%

An insecure person doesn’t know their true value, so they feel rejected, unaccepted, and abandoned. Unresolved insecurities control and influence our decision-making processes, which ultimately determine our future and hinder our success!

Nothing kills relationships quicker than unresolved insecurities. They destroy relationships, driving more people out of business and ministry than anything else. Most people just hide their insecurities, living behind masks and denying their true selves—and believers are sometimes the best at it! But in hiding our insecurities, we slowly lose who we were created to be.

Hiding your insecurities is like treating cancer with an aspirin. It might make you feel better for a couple of hours, but it won’t fix the problem.

Doing My Part

Getting along with others actually has more to do with us than with them.

1. I must deal with my own insecurities.

Knowing God and His love will positively affect our relationships, but we still need to work on our people skills. The true mark of a mature Christian is flexibility and tolerance. And Christ gets along with us based on who HE is—not on us.

May our dependably steady and warmly personal God develop maturity in you so that you can get along with each other as well as Christ gets along with us. (Rom. 15:6-7)

2. Find something good in others.

Those who are not like us may seem strange or weird. We find reasons not to like, accept, or get along with them. Nothing kills relationships quicker than unresolved insecurities. They destroy relationships, driving more people out of business and ministry than anything else. Confronting others to “straighten them out” will always create strife, even if we are right.

Don’t hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you’ve got it in you, get along with everybody. (Rom. 12:17)

3. Stop taking the easy way out.

Sometimes it’s easier to simply avoid other people. But this should be a last resort. Don’t get me wrong—some people you just have to love from a distance!

Those of us who are strong and able in the faith… lend a hand to those who falter, and not just do what is most convenient for us…. Each one of us needs to look after the good of the people around us, asking ourselves, “How can I help?” (Rom. 15:1-2)

4. Settle in your heart that it's okay to disagree.

Usually this is a big problem for insecure people.

Welcome with open arms fellow believers who don’t see things the way you do. And don’t jump all over them every time they do or say something you don’t agree with. Treat them gently. (Rom. 14:1-3)

5. Remember, people will always be people.

It’s impossible to have relationships and not have offenses from time to time. This is one of the greatest things I’ve learned over the years. It’s not what happens to me, but what happens in me that really matters!

Then said he unto the disciples, “It is impossible but that offenses will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come!” (Luke 17:1)

6. Learn to listen to others.

We must be willing to listen to other people! Clearly, flexibility and tolerance are the true marks of a mature Christian.

Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise: and he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding. (Prov. 17:28)