For many people, the subject of prayer is as exciting as watching paint dry. Yet we should not let the significance of prayer in our marriage escape us.
Prayer is the key to spiritual intimacy.
That sounds great, you may think, but what does that really mean?
We are three part beings, comprised of a spirit that has a soul, which lives in a body. As such, we can experience intimacy on three different levels: physical intimacy (our bodies), emotional intimacy (our souls), and spiritual intimacy (our spirits).
Praying with your spouse will develop spiritual intimacy and is as important to a marriage as physical intimacy. They are both manifestations of closeness in marriage. We all know how to get physically close, but when it comes to spiritual closeness, that is an entirely different ball game.
What Keeps Couples from Praying Together?
According to Joe Beam, author of “Becoming One,” three major reasons exist.
- Spiritual Lethargy: Prayer is simply not given the importance it deserves. We see it as a pointless, boring, religious duty.
- Misplaced Priorities: There are many distractions calling for our attention. You may feel that you don’t have time to pray together.
- Fear of Openness: Praying is a very personal act that leaves us vulnerable before God…and our spouse. Often, we don’t want our spouse to see our spiritual weaknesses or the true state of our relationship with God.
What Can We Do to Overcome These Obstacles?
Let’s look at three important areas:
- First Peter 1:22 tells us we can purify our souls (our mind, WILL, and emotions) by obeying the truth. When we obey God’s command to pray, our souls will be purified, and we’ll begin to experience the power of prayer.
- We find time for the things that are important to us. We eat and sleep because they are basic physical needs. Realize prayer is a basic spiritual need.
- When we encourage our spouses when they pray, fear of openness will subside. Don’t correct, interrupt, or criticize how your spouse prays. Let her/him open up to God without fear of the comments they may hear from you later.
Achieving spiritual intimacy through prayer will enrich your marriage in more ways than you can imagine.
Danny & Stephanie have served Latin America since 2011, serving in Peru for over 10 years on the pastoral staff and executive team of Camino de Vida, a vibrant church in the capital city of Lima.
Now based in Minnesota, they continue to serve pastors and their congregations throughout Latin America through consulting, resourcing, and retreats. Together they lead Footrock, a 501c3 with the purpose of creating spaces and opportunities for Latin American pastors and missionaries to find rest and meaningful relational connections.
They also speak at marriage conferences, events, and retreats in both North and South America, and in Asia (Jan 2024). Stephanie is also the host of the Modern Day Missions podcast for missionaries.