Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble, And He saved them out of their distresses. He brought them out of darkness and the shadow of death, And broke their chains in pieces. (Ps. 107: 13-14)
In our desperate need for love and affection, approval and closeness, many of us find ourselves falling into the arms of the wrong person. The more intimate you are with someone, the stronger that bond becomes. Sexual immorality is having sex with anyone to whom you are not married. God is not trying to withhold good from us by instructing us to withfrain from sex outside of marriage. He has developed certain guidelines for our benefit.
Having sexual intercourse isn’t just a physical encounter, it invades our soul. That’s why God’s instructions for when we are facing sexual temptation are very clear: flee (1 Cor. 6:18). There’s a reason God commanded us to run for our lives from this temptation. The road to recovery from sexual sin seems to be the most painful and requires the longest amount of healing time.
God’s original plan was for a man and woman to unite sexually as marriage partners. He wants us to have soul ties with our spouse. “For ‘the two’, He says, ‘shall become one flesh'” (1 Cor. 6:16, NKJV).
Once you have given yourself to someone sexually, the Bible says you become one. If you are not married, and that person is not obligated to be faithful to you or the relationship has ended, your soul may feel as if it is being ripped apart.
There really are consequences to casually sleeping around. Therapists call it “emotional anorexia” or learning to survive without relationships. It is damaging to your self-esteem and generates deep feelings of rejection whether you admit it or not.
According to PhysiciansForLife.Org, there are 10 negative psychological effects of sex outside of marriage (for teens and adults):
- Worry about pregnancy and stds
- Regret and self-recrimination
- Guilt
- Loss of self-respect & self-esteem
- The corruption of character and the debasement of sex
- Shaken trust & fear of commitment
- Rage over betrayal
- Depression and suicide
- Ruined relationships
- Stunting personal development
I would like to add an 11th point to these consequences of casual sex:
11. Separation from God
God is a forgiving God and a loving Heavenly Father; however, sin separates us from Him. When we remain in willful disobedience to God, a wall goes up between us. That’s not a place any of us want to be.
Sometimes we need this wake up call to stop doing what we are doing. We can’t justify it any longer. God is not pleased when we willfully continue in sin. There are consequences too big to pay.
I want you to be brutally honest with yourself if you are engaging in premarital sex or sex outside of marriage and recognize the urgency to stop. Ask the Lord to forgive you. Do not be too ashamed to go to Him. He already knows. Let the tears flow. Get in His presence and confess it to Him.
Sin destroys our lives. We must get it out of us. Whether you initiated it or not. Whether you intended to or not. Release it from your life now. Ask the Lord to forgive you and to remove this residue of sin from your life. If you fall again, don’t let it stop you from going to God. He is not mad at you. He is the only One who can truly give you the supernatural strength to resist and be free.
If you have a strong sexual addiction, then you may need to seek counseling. Do not withdraw from God. Lean on Him like never before. Do not justify sexual behavior because you’ve already yielded to it. It’s never too late to start over, be cleansed, and feel pure.
If you feel as if a sexual relationship has caused you to feel chained to this person and you cannot seem to break free, read this scripture out loud:
The righteous cry out and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. (Ps. 34:17-18, NIV)
God promises to deliver those who cry out to Him. The moment you cry out, He comes running. God is a gentleman; He waits for you to call on Him.
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For years, Terri Savelle Foy’s life was average. She had no dreams to pursue. Each passing day was just a repeat of the day before. Finally, with a marriage in trouble and her life falling apart, Terri made a change. She began to pursue God like never before, develop a new routine and discovered the power of having a dream and purpose.
As Terri started to recognize her own dreams and goals, she simply wrote them down and reviewed them consistently. This written vision became a road map to drive her life. As a result, those dreams are now a reality.
Terri has become the CEO of an international Christian ministry. She is an author, a conference speaker, and a success coach to hundreds of thousands of people all over the world. Her best-selling books Make Your Dreams Bigger than Your Memories and Imagine Big have helped people discover how to overcome the hurts of the past and see the possibilities of a limitless future. Her weekly podcast is a lifeline of hope and inspiration to people around the world.
Terri Savelle Foy is a cheerleader of dreams and is convinced that “if you can dream it, God can do it.” She is known across the globe as a world-class motivator of hope and success through her transparent and humorous teaching style. Terri’s unique ability to communicate success strategies in a simple and practical way has awakened the dreams of the young and old alike.
Terri shares from personal experience the biblical concepts of using the gift of the imagination to reach full potential in Jesus Christ. From stay-at-home moms to business executives, Terri consistently inspires others to go after their dreams. With step-by-step instruction and the inspiration to follow through, people are fueled with the passion to complete their life assignment down to the last detail (see John 17:4).
Terri and her husband, Rodney Foy, have been married since 1991, and are the parents of a beautiful redheaded daughter, Kassidi Cherie. They live near Dallas, Texas.